Friday, 1 May 2015

Letting Go

I will forever be an ALL or NOTHING kind of a girl.  You've either got my full and divided attention or else you've not got me at all and you might as well be talking to yourself.  When you have got me though; rest assured that i'll put every inch of every single thing that i've got into whatever i'm doing to see it through to the end.  Or else i wont start it all.  
*  *  *  
Lately i have been giving an awful LOT of thought to letting go:  To being able to wholly and completely let go of something:  drop it, leave it as it is, switch off, feel fully and truly like a task has been accomplished and finished.  And what i have realised is that it's not something i can do very easily at ALL.  In my head, i can always improve.  I fiddle, tweak and fanny with everything.  I can't start one task and finish one task and sit down.  Instead i spin several 'plates' all at the same time and as each plate falls, i pick up another.  I convince myself that i'm being super productive.  I should end each day feeling full, satisfied and like i have taken on the world and conquered it.  Yet often what i do feel is burnt out, exhausted and worst still;  like i do nothing but run the day through my head over and over and work out what i can do better to achieve more the next day.  Does it sound FAMILIAR?  Please tell me i'm not the only one!
Lately there's been so much talk of being more MINDFUL:  of accepting and being non-judgemental about our thoughts and feelings in the present moment.  It seems that the speed of life around us and sometimes the magnitude of tasks that we set ourselves to accomplish day in and day out is causing us to rethink how we deal with our own emotions because of it.

For me it's about breaking the CYCLE. And more than that, it's about easing off on myself a little.  It's about finding the balance between productivity and proactivity.  And i'm determined to change my mindset, starting now! 
*  I'd like to start LETTING GO of something when it's finished and recognising that i am only capable of so much.  And that piling more and more on top of my already towering workload, doesn't make me more productive.  

*  I think that i should focus more on what i have achieved, completed and done well and to the very best of my ability rather than over-think those things that i haven't had time to accomplish. 

*  I'd like to learn to LEAVE work at work!  Instead of constantly thinking about work when i'm not there, i'd like to be able to keep my mind on what i am doing away from work instead of constantly wiling away the hours mindlessly!

*  I want to make more of a HABIT to do the things that CLEAR my mind, unwind my little head and help me switch off.  Instead of sitting for an hour on my phone on Instagram {okay well maybe just fifteen minutes instead!} i'd like to spend more time outside on my bike; cutting, sticking or using my creative juices.  

Okay so it's a SHORT list, but it's a starting point right?! 
  
How do YOU switch off?  Do you find yourself adding ten things to your daily to-do list each time you cross off one?  Can you remember the last time you just got lost in the moment?  Or better still the last time you felt really and truly happy?  

I'd LOVE to know.  I'd also love to know if you have any tips for letting go and doing just one thing at a time.  Even better if you are like me but have DISCOVERED a magic remedy that might give me some hope!

*  All photos taken on a recent trip northward to my parents in Scotland where i let go and felt all of the better for it!

2 comments:

  1. Oh god, I know how you feel!

    Somedays I just don't know where to start. I have to do lists coming out of my bag, my sleeves ... And even though I don't cross everything off, I know I've done SO much that day, but it's just not recognised on my to-do lists. So I've taken to creating a separate list of 'things I have done/achieved today.' Makes me feel so much better and eases the pressure I put on myself.

    Rhiân

    xxx

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  2. Yes, a thousand time yes to this post. I am a ridiculous perfectionist and yet I also beat myself up for being a lazy slob at other times. I find it hard to accept I've done my best or leave things alone, to switch off and be in the moment. We've trained our brains to be so hyper-responsive to all the stimulants we have these days that we've forgotten how to truly relax. Doing something creative/crafty with my hands helps (if i find the time), walking and walking, running with my ipod, reading (when I'm not too tired) and taking photographs help me. xx

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